EDIT: This was originally written and posted prior to my gastric bypass surgery, and subsequent weight loss, that took place three years ago. While many of these things are no long an outward daily struggle, a good deal of this psychological burden still lives heavily in my subconscious – and I felt it made sense to keep a post like this active so that those reading my blog would understand my thought process.
I ordered new boots online. They just came in today – and they don’t fit.
And now I’m sitting on the floor of my room, trying not to cry about it.
Sure, this is a common annoyance for anyone who orders an item of clothing online. After all, you can stick that tape measure every which way and assume that a medium is a medium is a medium everywhere – but there’s that chance that something still isn’t going to fit.
This isn’t what I’m talking about. This isn’t why I’ve shut my door and turned off my lights. This isn’t what sent all of my emotions spiraling home.
This is the moment in which I stop to look and see how far I’ve come – and yet, how much longer I have to go.